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Why My Social Life is in the Toilet

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Sunday, July 17, 2011

Why My Social Life is in the Toilet

Everyone in my house has the expectation that the weekend is about them. Leo wants to meet friends for dinner or a beer, Nico wants to hang out with friends, Isabella wants to sleep at my sister's (could be any of them) and Tommy wants to sleep at his friend's. I think Gia's expectation is to be attached to me every second of the day. Every weekend I have the expectation that I will get a little break and get some help around the house. Why is my expectation the only one not met? Well, in all fairness, this weekend, Nico's and Tommy's were not met either. However, they had backup plans so they still had a good weekend. Leo didn't check with me to see if we had plans (we actually did) that didn't involve Tommy going to a friend's. Not wanting to let him down, Leo let him go. That meant that Nico's plans fell through and was going to end up sitting home alone (not the end of the world) while his friends hung out. I felt bad for him but Leo still wanted to go out. Here's the thing about Leo and the thing about me. He has a million gift cards from coaching to various restaurants so he only wants to go there. I just wanted to grab a quick bite and wanted to go to a restaurant where we didn't have a gift card. I had sushi last Monday night and now the craving for it is bad. If you like sushi and live near Wheaton (I know it is a chain so that isn't the only place), Wok and Fire is sooo good. Anyway, we argued for an hour. He didn't want to let one kid down and I didn't want to let the other down. Do not mistake us as parents who are afraid of telling their kids no or that we are teaching them that the world revolves around them. This was more of a stand still with Leo and me. It was a miscommunication between Leo and me which Nico was going to take the hit for. I wouldn't have enjoyed myself at dinner anyway knowing that happened.

I think everyone here forgets that we have Gia sometimes. I know Leo does. He'll come home and have this big plan of what he wants to do and I just look at him and say, "Did you forget we have a 17 month old and someone has to be home with her?" Most times he'll say, "Well, let's just bring her." It is not fair to her or for anyone in contact with her to have her still awake at 9 or 10:00. Once in awhile is fine but it screws up my whole week when she is off schedule like that. Plus, how much fun am I going to have chasing her around or trying to get her to sit at a restaurant (again, why am I not 90lbs?)? More times than not, I just tell Leo to go without me or take the other kids. Lately, though, I have noticed my social life is in the toilet and his hasn't missed a beat. It would be nice once in awhile for both of us to stay home since we BOTH have a 17 month old. Then again, that might lead to him wanting to play Scrabble so maybe I am better off...

In the end, I told Leo and Nico to go see a movie. They could spend some time together that wasn't in a car on the way to a baseball game, basketball game or football game. I wouldn't have to hear how I never want to do anything Leo wants to do and I wouldn't have to hear Nico complain that his friends were hanging out without him. Gia was happily asleep after being attached all day, Isabella was sleeping at my sister's and then...what do you know? Tommy got dropped off from a friend's at 10:30 with the dad, the son and Tommy at the front door with Tommy and the friend asking, "Can we have a sleepover?" Well...three out of four kids happy is better than nothing, right?

2 Comments:

At July 29, 2011 at 8:36 PM , Blogger T said...

Nobody with a 17month old has a social life! Sleep is way more important for her - and, thus you - to be happy people. Hang in there!

 
At July 30, 2011 at 9:19 AM , Blogger AnnMarie said...

Good to hear that it is normal to not have a social life. I was feeling pretty bad that my kids (and sometimes my husband) have a busier social life than me but you are right. If she sleeps, we are all happy.

 

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