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Tuesday, December 27, 2011


With hosting, I have not been able to get on the computer at all so this is going to be a long one. Christmas was very bittersweet. We did end up going to church on Christmas Eve and Gia was good for some of it and I was outside with other parents and their small children for some of it. I do love the warm feeling I get at church and hope my kids get the same feeling. I would love to be able to go to church every Sunday and have Gia on my lap sitting quietly but it only lasts for about three minutes. We then went to my mom's where there was a ridiculous amount of food. It was nice but not the same. People that are normally there weren't and their absence was felt. Of course, my kids didn't want to leave so we didn't leave until around 11. We have a tradition where we go look at the lights after we leave my mom and dad's. There is a neighborhood that has all the Disney characters and the kids always love going to see those. All the way home I kept hearing the kids say, "I hope Santa wraps the gifts." I was in for a long night.

Long story short, I was up until 2:30 wrapping. It was rough. I tried to make it even but Belle's stuff was a lot less inexpensive so there was more for her to open. I felt bad for Nico because he had about 5 very expensive gifts but just to look at his pile made me feel bad. I knew that what he really, really wanted wasn't there but I couldn't justify spending $200 on one gift for him. He wanted the Dr. Dre earphones and unless they guarantee they don't damage the hearing of those that are using them, why in the world are they so much money?? I am trying to instill in my kids that if they really want something that is that much money, they have to work for at least half of it. Anyway, I crawled in bed at around 2:45 and Gia started screaming with what sounded like a scary scream at about 2:50. I finally fell asleep at around 3:30 and the kids woke me up at 8:00. We let Gia sleep while they went downstairs. They seemed happy with what they got. Nico was bummed that he got a lot of stuff for the Xbox and it still isn't back from getting fixed. He liked the college hoops clothes that he got. Tommy liked the PSP games he got but then announced that he couldn't find his PSP. Belle liked her things, especially the microscope that she wasn't sure whether to put on her list but LOVED that Santa knew she really wanted it. Gia woke up around 9:00 and the look on her face when she saw her toys was priceless. It really made all the stress melt away (for a moment).

I already posted my Christmas list and from it, I got black slouchy boots and Blake Shelton's Best of CD. I mentioned that I wanted the Nook color at some point and he got me that. I just found out I might be able to get on Facebook with it and that will make me very happy because I have been missing a friend that I normally chat on there with since my computer is still broken and Leo's doesn't let me chat. I also got a gift certificate to Entree Kitchen which I really love to use when I want a home cooked meal but don't feel like cooking it. Leo did well this year. I know it is incredibly ungrateful to say but I was a little bummed that either my old computer fixed or a new computer wasn't under the tree. I just hate this one so much.

I got Leo a travel bag to replace the one that got thrown away in the clean up (I think he might have shed a real tear over that one getting thrown out), a custom made coach's shirt for the basketball team he coaches, a box of Starbuck's coffees (that is a yearly tradition), pajama bottoms and a mirror/radio for the shower. For his stocking, I got him slippers (that he probably won't wear) and about 10 packs of gum since I am tired of him asking me, "Do you have any gum?"

I think Christmas Day was a success. I got a few emails and texts saying it was nice. I am glad it is over. I tried to just enjoy the moment but it is stressful to feed that many people. We had a moment where we weren't sure how to cook all of the food with one stove. At the end of the night, Nico was really upset. He said he wanted to talk to me in private and shared that it wasn't about the gifts but that he was sad watching the twins be so excited with the whole Santa thing. He said Christmas didn't feel like it used to and he missed it. He understood that his stuff was more money but he felt sad when he saw the mound of gifts for the others and the small one for him. It didn't help that he had no Xbox and the hoop my sister bought him was the wrong one. My mom gave us a family gift that didn't come in yet so most of his gifts were a "here you go, you can't use it yet." Plus, he thought I was trying to throw him off with telling him I'd never get those earphones so he really thought he was getting them. I feel bad that the reality of "adult" Christmas has hit him because let's face isn't the same as we get older. I talked to him about the magic and warmth that I feel at church and that it starts to feel good to give gifts instead of receive them (still feels pretty good to receive, though). He felt bad that I felt bad that I didn't make it special for him and said it wasn't me. That it was just different and missed the old feeling. Me, too.

It was nice to be with family and friends this weekend and a lot of memories were made (Truth Be Told was a fun game with a lot of laughs). I found out that you can still get a hangover from drinking all day without ever feeling buzzed or drunk (God, I love mimosas and I think I tried every kind of Moscato wine). My mom is a great cook and the food was delicious. I don't think I need to eat for a month and my diet definitely is starting on January 2nd. It wasn't the same as when my Nana and Papa and my Grams and Gramps had it but then that is what happens with the holidays as we get older...people that should be there aren't and it becomes a holiday of not only feeling blessed for what you have (and I definitely feel blessed) but feeling a little sad for what you don't.


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