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Tuesday, August 2, 2011

To Share or Not To Share

I have been torn on whether to blog about what's been going on over here but I just checked and I made reference to it back in my post about Wisconsin Dells. My doctor thought I had hand foot mouth like the kids but it didn't go away with the medicine they gave me. I saw an oral surgeon and he confirmed what I was dreading. He needed to biopsy the little white bump on my tongue that hurt. After many sleepless nights, I went today to have it done. I have to tell you, when he told me that it would feel like I bit my tongue, he lied. Or when he bites his tongue, he really bites his tongue. I have two stitches and the worst part is that I have to eat with the meds he gave me but I need the meds in order to eat and the last thing I want to do is eat. I know it is nothing. I know I have no risk factors. I know I had to do this to find out it is nothing. I hate every single second of it. There is a wide spectrum of things it could  be before it is the scary thing and that there is only a 4% chance of the scary thing but after the whole odds/percentage thing with CF, I don't feel comforted.

I debated on whether to blog about this because it feels scarier and more than it is once it is in writing but it is occupying all of my brain right now. I can't talk at all (and the world lets out a collective sigh of relief) so I don't want people to think I am rude when I don't answer the phone or strike up a conversation with them. When I do try and talk, the stitches get in the way so I am guessing even as the pain subsides, talking will still not be happening. For the record, when I was talking about wanting to lose weight, this was not the way I wanted to.

If you could just say a quick prayer that I don't need the pain meds after tonight and that the results (which I won't know until August 16...apparently they don't care that I'll be losing sleep) are nothing to worry about ( I know it will be fine), I would appreciate it. There is something powerful when more than two people stand in prayer so I will take comfort in that for the next 2 weeks.

A quick thanks to a few people: Leo for going with me today, my dad and sister for watching the kids, my other sister for making me soup and coming over tomorrow, my BFF (R.C.) for coming over to relieve my dad, bringing me soup and staying until Leo got home taking care of all the stuff I have to do so I could take the pain meds, and another BFF, (K.T.) for bringing me a milkshake when the soup wouldn't work. Many others offered to help or couldn't because of work or other things going on and I want you to know that every offer and texts of well wishes was appreciated!

3 Comments:

At August 2, 2011 at 9:04 PM , Blogger lamb said...

I will definitely say prayers for you! I can't believe you have to wait 2 weeks! that is insane and cruel!! try to get some rest. at least you can still blog. hope you feel better very soon. :)

 
At August 3, 2011 at 5:35 AM , Blogger Kendra Mareva said...

2 weeks!? WTH? I've had biopsy results come back faster from the vet! Good lord! I will definitely keep you in my thoughts. Hang in there chiquita.

 
At August 3, 2011 at 5:39 AM , Blogger Crystal said...

2 weeks is a crazy amount of time to had to wait! Torture! (hug) Praying for you.

 

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